Kids, let me explain you a thing

It always makes me mucho sado when I happily say to someone, “I KNOW! We can go to Starbucks!” Generally after they say that they want something good to drink and they say, “Ugh, but I don’t drink coffee…”

Hey man, it’s cool. You are not required to drink, like, or even desire coffee…

But let me explain you a thing… While it IS true that Starbucks is known for it’s delicious dark and dreamy roasts of beans from far away, Starbucks sells a lot of dang things that ARE NOT COFFEE!

I will never ever forget working there and people coming in all the time shocked, no OFFENDED… IRATE! APPALLLED that I would suggest that their small child might want something as well! It was as though I had just suggested that their sweet faced cherub drink thousand year old vodka from satan’s bum hole… “NO! CHILDREN DO NOT DRINK the COFFEE!” To which I would say in kindly terms, “Sir, or Madame… we sell things here that are distinctly not coffee.”

It always baffles me because the menu truly IS right there above my head… no, really… look up. It’s there.

Let me tell you some of the amazing things that you can do that are NOT coffee…

Strawberry lemonades.
I was NOT a fan of these but they were a big hit. Essentially, Starbucks takes the strawberry that they use in other drinks (real strawberries) and pours a bit into some lemonade. People LOVED these during the summer! Ingredients… strawberries… lemonade… >_>

Iced Teas.
SOME people might whine that these are just as bad as coffee and I hear ya, but a passion tea with a squirt of velencia really hits the spot. Ingredients… passion tea, velencia syrup.

Creme’ frappucinos…
Please… when you come in, order a FRAP and not a CAP… We heard this so often that we’d literally make the cappucino just to piss the poor person ordering it off.

Anyways, any CREME frappucino is “coffee free” “sans coffee” “coffee count = zero…” These are GREAT because they are just like shakes! A vanilla bean frappucino is like a vanilla shake, and a chocolate creme frap is like a chocolate shake! AND GUESS WHAT! You can get creative too! Try getting a vanilla creme and tell the guy to add a spoonful of chocolate chips! They also have green tea frappucinos which are made with matcha powder and syrup.

Hot Chocolates-
You might have guessed that this item does NOT have coffee in it… because it doesn’t! XD Ingredients… milk, chocolate, vanilla syrup (word to the wise, order this one with one LESS pump of chocolate and an extra pump of vanilla… for whatever reason SB uses a formula for this that makes it taste like mud…literally 😛 )

Caramel apple cider-
These are so good! Basically all they do is steam apple juice and add a ton of caramel, but it’s still amazing!

Milk-
Yes, you can order a plain milk at SB.

CHOCOLATE milk-
Wonder of wonders, you can do that too.

WHITE hot chocolate-
Most SB’s will know what this means. Basically it’s a white mocha without the coffee. (you can also add a shot of peppermint, or hazelnut to hot chocolates btw for a different flavor)

Vanilla steamer –
It’s like a vanilla latte without coffee.

Starbucks ALSO sells smoothies now! These are totally coffee-less.

If that wasn’t enough, in their case they also sell a variety of beverages that are neither coffee nor milk related. Often they’re sodas or juices, or even juice BOXES…

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So please… when I ask you if you want to go get starbucks, don’t tell me that you don’t drink coffee… 😛

 

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Internet Articles

Internet articles are so ridiculous sometimes…
“How to avoid insomnia… 31 tips and tricks that you absolutely MUST know!”
Me: Wow, okay, *opens*…
Article : Trick number 1… make sure it’s dark.
Me: DAMMIT! I’ve been doing it wrong all of these years… So has everyone else! We all sleep with the lights blazing! What other nuggets of wisdom can this second coming of an article have to offer?
Article: Tip number 19, “Avoid drink coffee before you go to bed”
ME: FOILED AGAIN! This is the ONLY time I drink coffee!
Article: Trick Number 22, “Avoid loud noises, make sure it’s quiet!”
Me: … *turns to the marching band…* “Guys, I won’t be needing your services tonight… no, Arnoldo… you don’t need to bang that drum anymore…
Article: Don’t sleep with lions, arachnids, or any other poisonous or potentially dangerous creature.
Me: Oh, now you’re just being silly.

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Doing it wrong^ lights on…

 

Women are sluts… it’s obvious because of their short skirts and stuff

Let me start off this blog with a disclaimer…

I am not for one minute saying that (in my personal opinion) there are not women who wear too little, or perhaps behave in a way that they shouldn’t. 

But, every so often I have to tackle this “women need to dress modestly in church” thing… because apparently women who are not modest “CAUSE THE MENZ TO STUMBLZZ” 

Look, I will be the FIRST to say that yes, there are OBVIOUSLY some things that are NOT appropriate for church. 

But in most cases, I would be willing to say that THOSE things are pretty cut and dry. You don’t wear a skirt that’s only four inches long and a pair of black stiletto heels to church. That’s just weird on all accounts. 

But the moment that I start seeing these articles about “cleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavage” and “tight pants” regarding women, I go off the handle a little bit, and the reason is because we don’t live in the 1800’s anymore. 

What are we REALLY saying when we’re complaining that women are dressing too provocatively in church? We’re basically saying, “I noticed that your boobs were showing just a tad too much and your thigh is also staring at me… so, you need to stop that and dress more modestly… of course, all of the other BILLIONS on women on the planet are not doing that… and I totally notice them too because obviously I noticed you, so I’m obviously letting my mind wander when I shouldn’t be… but you seriously need to stop. Everyone else? I can’t make them stop. But YOU need to. Definitely. Your GAPING CLEVauuuge is just too much for my eyes… even though those other girls are also doing it and I can’t stop them, and I totally oggle them too… but YOU? You need to stop. This is a holy place.”

I think I’m making my point. 

If you are SO WRAPPED UP in what I’m wearing in church, then the likelihood ? you’re also pretty wrapped up in what ALL women are wearing EVERYWHERE… so make ME cover everything until YOU’RE satisfied just so that you can watch the OTHER girls walk by and shake your head at THEM while licking your lips? 

You might not have noticed yet, so let me bring you up to speed… the year is 2014… the world is suffering from a pandemic of … BOOBS… THEY’RE EVERYWHERE! TWO SETS FOR EVERY MAN! Turn around and THERE THEY ARE! OMGOSH!… Turn on your computer and WHAM … you are assaulted! WITH BREASTS! EVERYONE SEEMS TO HAVE THEM! AND THEY’RE COMING AT YOU LIKE SUPERMAN ON SPEED!!! Like the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE THERE IS NO STOPPING IT! Only one thing, only ONE MAN CAN SAVE US FROM THIS HORRIFYING REALITY! SHOOT THE WOMEN IN THE HEAD! IT’S THE ONLY WAY TO STOP THEM! 

Okay… not really… but actually? Kind of. 

See, here’s the thing about who we are as a community, a culture, a society, and a race here and now. If you haven’t noticed, clothing is mostly CULTURAL… and believe it or not, most people get along JUST fine with whatever that culture is. Some cultures wear VERY LITTLE clothing because it’s hot. There’s STILL rape, violence, and lust… some cultures wear TONS of clothing because it’s cultural… you might have guessed it… there’s STILL rape, violence, and EVEN LUST! 

I live over here in Sunny, Southern Californ I AY… where literally the moment that I leave my house I am assaulted by butt shorts and bikini tops (the beach ain’t that  far away)… Am I DYING?! Am I averting my eyes?! Are people crashing into TELEPHONE POLES BECAUSE OMGGGGGGG LEGGGGGGS?!!?!?!?!… not really… most of us are used to it. People still get along. Girls still meet boys who treat them like people, and basically everyone is chill. *shrug* 

But that’s how it is…

PART of our problem in this country about “how much is showing” has to do with what you’ve/we’ve done to OURSELVES… In this country, EVERYTHING is sexualized. There’s a porn shop on every other corner a mile away from a strip joint, a few blocks away from a gay bar, and a dirty condom’s throw away from a nasty movie theatre… There are bill boards out in the open with porn advertisements, and song and dances about the nearest strip club… and yet…seemingly… there are no AWESOME protesters standing at the bases of these signs crying and screaming until they’re taken down! No, we simply turn to our wives and daughters and say, “That tank top is too skanky… I know it’s like 104 degrees outside, but you need to cover yourself”… Get that wives and daughters? Sisters and mom’s? No complaints about the TOTALLY OBVIOUS strip club poster…just about YOUR boobs… Because you’re somehow unholy for dressing like everyone else in today’s modern world while the man complaining is 9 times out of ten? USUALLY the one with the problem.

Christian Men are interesting creatures to me in this day and age. IMHO unless you are literally WARRING against every single moment of cleavage everywhere in everyplace, you really have no room to talk, complain, whine, or even BELCH that you’re “being tempted” or “distracted” or “might stummmmmmmmbbblllleeee”…

If you go to church and complain that young women are dressing too provocatively and then go home and watch Game of Thrones? Please, do humanity a favor and SHUT YOUR FLAPPING PIE HOLE… You are literally going and putting sexualized images into your head (and that’s TOTALLY okay, right?) and then complaining because a woman is wearing a tube top on a hot day… and she’s OBVIOUSLY doing it to make you stumble… Get a flippin’ grip, and get a flippin’ clue…

SO OFTEN, the men that I see complaining about things like the dreaded “CLEVauuggge” are the same people who watch all kinds of dirt on television, or play video games with lewd imagery. This is literally melting your mind if you’re even ATTEMPTING to “not stumble” because the very TOP of a woman’s breasts might be GLARING at you. Don’t go play Soul Calibur and then show up at church and complain that someone’s skirt is too short. Just…don’t…

Don’t LOOK at women in a sexual light, and then complain that women are dressing sexually. No. Abandon that HEART and that frame of mind and realize that you can NOT stop the way that women dress and while I agree that Christian women shouldn’t be wearing THIS to church-
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Or this – 
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or especially this- 
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The PROBLEM is that when we start talking about HOW MUCH is too much (or how little is too little) there will be a VAST difference of opinions because Christian Men ARE strange beings (as are women) and everyone has different things that “set them off” if you will. 

Is THIS too much?!

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OR THIS?!?!
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OMGOSH HOW ABOUT THIS?!?!

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How about this?! 
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I think she’s definitely trying to seduce someone… those pants are form fitting and if she bent at all… all of that CLEVauuge! 

Who gets to decide who is “too naked” … and “trying to make men stumble” ??? That’s the conversation I’d love to be in on. “Her boob is peeking out just a little too much… oops, the dress is just above her knee, she definitely wants to slut herself raw.” 

Seriously… stop acting like you are so offended by “breasts” or like they’re forbidden or you can’t look at a woman with them and be tempted or something… It’s the 21st century for goodness sakes… Did you go see any of the movies this year or last? Did you not see this?!
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or this?!

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Quickly boycott these movies immediately! Boobs, and CLEVAUGE every place we look! Tight fitting clothing andd… annnd… oh no… oh not this… anything but this… I… I can’t even…I can’t even CLOSE to can’t even… I am so far from evening…It can’t be it’s… 
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You might ask me “why” ? … “Why Lisa? Why are you so mad and so passionate and so bitter sounding about such a topic? Is it because YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU want to dress slutty in church?” 

No… actually, it’s not. It’s because one time, I was basically made to feel ridiculous (by a fellow WOMAN btw) and as if I was trying to “seduce” men, or at least make them stumble by wearing what was essentially this, 

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Now, the sleeves were shorter, (cap sleeves) and the chest was a BIT more open (hard not to do with me as my chest is HUGE) as was the skirt, (just above my knee) but that’s not the point. 

The point is that I thought that I looked “pretty”… not “sexy” or “trying to seduce men”… 

This is why this whole “what’s too little” thing is dangerous after a point… yes, we should (as women) not dress like we are going clubbing to church… but what’s the point in making a woman feel badly if she is dressed like the above? 

Seriously… men… can you stop with the “act”…? You’re fooling no one. Your heart is impure so you can’t stand that women come to church in something that you glare at every single day… you only notice it because IN CHURCH is where the holy spirit dwells, and that’s when you start to feel guilty… honestly? I’d actually start asking why it is that the holy spirit isn’t guiding you OUTSIDE of church too like Job (who promised not to look upon a woman… not “only if she was dressed modestly…” period). Because I think that THAT’S the real question.

Want to get away… sad birthday

a little… maybe… not really. XD

As many of you know, I have had a HARD HARD HARD passed 10ish months. (PLUS actually)

If you don’t know, I’ll give you a little background.

In December of 2012 I lost my cat two days before Christmas… it was a long battle and the LAST time that I asked for some help/support on the internet because the doctors weren’t sure if he was going to survive or not, and I had to pay for the medical bills somehow.

January/February of 2013 I had a root canal procedure that was horrifying… Basically, the dentist believes that he (during procedure) “nicked my nerve” or something and I ended up in horrible pain that caused mild PTSD

In March of 2013, I found out that due to some negligence on my husband’s behalf, and a slew of other “bombs” that were dropped on us, we owed multiple places over $6,000 dollars… since then, life has spun out of control for far too long.

In MAY of 2013, I had a serious burn accident that wound me up in the emergency room leaving me with a bill of over 2,000$ (for them to take my vitals, give me a shot, and put cream on my ankle btw…) LUCKILY (even though it’s taken this long) I’m getting some money for that but ONLY to pay the bills. Nothing “extra”. The burn that I was told would take a “week” to heal actually took about three months and left some scarring.

In July (LATE july ) the REAL trouble started. I basically woke up one saturday morning believing that I had a UTI… Went to the doctor, they found nothing, but put me on antibiotics anyways… This began a (what is now) TEN MONTH road of pain, suffering, antibiotics, countless “diagnosis” and overall hurt/shame/horror/depression/etc…

Not to mention the fact that I am not better yet. I BELIEVE that I’m getting there, but I’m not better 😥

In AUGUST of 2013 due to a bunch of ridiculous things. We lost our car. 😥 And have literally been carless ever since. Which is NOT easy in California. We’ve had to rely on everyone and everything just to “go places”…

This all the while I was going to doctors, getting blood drawn…

I could go through the list of things that I’ve been diagnosed with, or the antibiotics that I’ve been on… bottom line? I was never fully made aware of exactly what has happened to me… and in the end? I just have to “wait and see” kind of thing (no longer on antibiotics)… I was FINALLY (in Feb) diagnosed with Vestibulitis… basically, it means that I am in pain when “disturbed” there… I’m married, this has GREATLY disrupted my married life.

Also, I was essentially told by a doctor that due to all of my medications, I have all but RUINED my body’s bacteria, and health…wonderful…

All I want now? To be able to go for a small “vacation” with my husband for my birthday. Not a week, not a month… just a day or two to rest over near Disneyland and have a nice time. My room will be FREE, and I have just a tad bit of money set aside for gas/ etc (if we can barrow someone’s car which I don’t even know yet…) I know it sounds terrible… but even if you can donate a few dollars to me… that’d be SO WONDERFUL to give me just a small break from all of this stupidity and madness…

I’ve only really listed the tip of the iceberg here as far as how difficult this has been.

But, rest assured, I’m holding strong, and God is good.

Donate Button with Credit Cards

Some people want incentive to donate sometimes… so, AS incentive, if you DO donate and you WANT it… I’ll be sending everyone who donates more than 10$ (more than… yes, 10.01 counts) a little piece of jewelry (a ring or a pair of bobby pins or something)… just to say thanks. ^_^ If you don’t want to donate, but want to help, you can always buy something from my shop!

https://www.etsy.com/people/Lisaslittleluxuries?ref=si_pr

Feel free to ask me ANY questions that you want and thank you so much!
birthday
 

UP IN ARMS OVER FREEDOM

Guuuuiz… 

I don’t know anymore. I just don’t know. I didn’t even know how to start this entry, which is why I’m having a difficult time doing so. 

Listen… 

Facebook is blowing up with this story –
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2014/05/06/watch-what-happens-when-one-parent-speaks-out-at-a-school-board-meeting-about-a-controversial-book-assigned-to-his-daughter/

As someone who has multiple facebooks, I can tell you that this story is being thrown about here, there and everywhere… 

But what’s really amazing to me is the comments that this story is getting. 

Right and left, the biggest issue that I see people complaining about is the father and his lack of “educating his young daughter” about sex and rape…

Does this seem odd to you? Think about it. This story breaks, and everyone is ultra concerned that the dad won’t let a sexually explicit (debatable) part in a book because he has NOT educated her about sex and rape…

I have several issues with these comments and have in fact been flamed a few times for my comments regarding the story and what happened. 

The first one is that the commentators are ASSUMING that the father HASN’T educated his daughter about sex and rape… No where in the video that I’ve seen four or five times does the father say, “Um, excuse me, yeah…hi…my daughter is so totally virginal that we cover her ears when someone says the “S” word… yeah, we also tell her to plug them and hum if someone says pee pee or poo poo…” No, you will not find this in any of the transcript regarding what was said at the meeting. 

Why is it then that people are making SUCH a big deal over this? No one is saying that the girl is not educated in sex and rape… in fact, I can tell you that being a virgin for 24 years before I was married (where I lost my virginity), I actually knew MORE about sex and rape than several people my age HAVING sex, INCLUDING my own mother who lived through the seventies. 

My SECOND issues is this-… why is this video being turned on the father as being the “BAD GUY” ? 

The father simply didn’t want someone OTHER than him or his family to give his daughter material that was explicit… it’s HIS opinion, it’s HIS child! 

My THIRD issue… Everyone is focusing on the WRONG thing in this story… What we all NEED to be talking about is why is it that a man who was not SCREAMING or even YELLING but instead voicing his opinion about the content of something given to his daughter being ARRESTED? Furthermore, why is everyone sitting there looking like scared sheep… ???

THAT is the conversation that we need to be having. It really is. 

Why is it that in a room full of several people no one said, “This is America, it’s a free country, he has the right to voice his opinion and argue a subject regarding his own children without the fear or threat of being arrested… ” ??? Why is it that instead they all look like they’re literally terrified of being whipped or arrested or heaven forbid even SHOT? 

Are we all becoming that TRAINED? 

Seriously… think about this… 

You might not agree with WHAT he stood up for… but if this is what happens when you stand up for anything ESPECIALLY pertaining to your own children… what kind of country do we live in?