Let me start off this blog with a disclaimer…
I am not for one minute saying that (in my personal opinion) there are not women who wear too little, or perhaps behave in a way that they shouldn’t.
But, every so often I have to tackle this “women need to dress modestly in church” thing… because apparently women who are not modest “CAUSE THE MENZ TO STUMBLZZ”
Look, I will be the FIRST to say that yes, there are OBVIOUSLY some things that are NOT appropriate for church.
But in most cases, I would be willing to say that THOSE things are pretty cut and dry. You don’t wear a skirt that’s only four inches long and a pair of black stiletto heels to church. That’s just weird on all accounts.
But the moment that I start seeing these articles about “cleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavage” and “tight pants” regarding women, I go off the handle a little bit, and the reason is because we don’t live in the 1800’s anymore.
What are we REALLY saying when we’re complaining that women are dressing too provocatively in church? We’re basically saying, “I noticed that your boobs were showing just a tad too much and your thigh is also staring at me… so, you need to stop that and dress more modestly… of course, all of the other BILLIONS on women on the planet are not doing that… and I totally notice them too because obviously I noticed you, so I’m obviously letting my mind wander when I shouldn’t be… but you seriously need to stop. Everyone else? I can’t make them stop. But YOU need to. Definitely. Your GAPING CLEVauuuge is just too much for my eyes… even though those other girls are also doing it and I can’t stop them, and I totally oggle them too… but YOU? You need to stop. This is a holy place.”
I think I’m making my point.
If you are SO WRAPPED UP in what I’m wearing in church, then the likelihood ? you’re also pretty wrapped up in what ALL women are wearing EVERYWHERE… so make ME cover everything until YOU’RE satisfied just so that you can watch the OTHER girls walk by and shake your head at THEM while licking your lips?
You might not have noticed yet, so let me bring you up to speed… the year is 2014… the world is suffering from a pandemic of … BOOBS… THEY’RE EVERYWHERE! TWO SETS FOR EVERY MAN! Turn around and THERE THEY ARE! OMGOSH!… Turn on your computer and WHAM … you are assaulted! WITH BREASTS! EVERYONE SEEMS TO HAVE THEM! AND THEY’RE COMING AT YOU LIKE SUPERMAN ON SPEED!!! Like the ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE THERE IS NO STOPPING IT! Only one thing, only ONE MAN CAN SAVE US FROM THIS HORRIFYING REALITY! SHOOT THE WOMEN IN THE HEAD! IT’S THE ONLY WAY TO STOP THEM!
Okay… not really… but actually? Kind of.
See, here’s the thing about who we are as a community, a culture, a society, and a race here and now. If you haven’t noticed, clothing is mostly CULTURAL… and believe it or not, most people get along JUST fine with whatever that culture is. Some cultures wear VERY LITTLE clothing because it’s hot. There’s STILL rape, violence, and lust… some cultures wear TONS of clothing because it’s cultural… you might have guessed it… there’s STILL rape, violence, and EVEN LUST!
I live over here in Sunny, Southern Californ I AY… where literally the moment that I leave my house I am assaulted by butt shorts and bikini tops (the beach ain’t that far away)… Am I DYING?! Am I averting my eyes?! Are people crashing into TELEPHONE POLES BECAUSE OMGGGGGGG LEGGGGGGS?!!?!?!?!… not really… most of us are used to it. People still get along. Girls still meet boys who treat them like people, and basically everyone is chill. *shrug*
But that’s how it is…
PART of our problem in this country about “how much is showing” has to do with what you’ve/we’ve done to OURSELVES… In this country, EVERYTHING is sexualized. There’s a porn shop on every other corner a mile away from a strip joint, a few blocks away from a gay bar, and a dirty condom’s throw away from a nasty movie theatre… There are bill boards out in the open with porn advertisements, and song and dances about the nearest strip club… and yet…seemingly… there are no AWESOME protesters standing at the bases of these signs crying and screaming until they’re taken down! No, we simply turn to our wives and daughters and say, “That tank top is too skanky… I know it’s like 104 degrees outside, but you need to cover yourself”… Get that wives and daughters? Sisters and mom’s? No complaints about the TOTALLY OBVIOUS strip club poster…just about YOUR boobs… Because you’re somehow unholy for dressing like everyone else in today’s modern world while the man complaining is 9 times out of ten? USUALLY the one with the problem.
Christian Men are interesting creatures to me in this day and age. IMHO unless you are literally WARRING against every single moment of cleavage everywhere in everyplace, you really have no room to talk, complain, whine, or even BELCH that you’re “being tempted” or “distracted” or “might stummmmmmmmbbblllleeee”…
If you go to church and complain that young women are dressing too provocatively and then go home and watch Game of Thrones? Please, do humanity a favor and SHUT YOUR FLAPPING PIE HOLE… You are literally going and putting sexualized images into your head (and that’s TOTALLY okay, right?) and then complaining because a woman is wearing a tube top on a hot day… and she’s OBVIOUSLY doing it to make you stumble… Get a flippin’ grip, and get a flippin’ clue…
SO OFTEN, the men that I see complaining about things like the dreaded “CLEVauuggge” are the same people who watch all kinds of dirt on television, or play video games with lewd imagery. This is literally melting your mind if you’re even ATTEMPTING to “not stumble” because the very TOP of a woman’s breasts might be GLARING at you. Don’t go play Soul Calibur and then show up at church and complain that someone’s skirt is too short. Just…don’t…
Don’t LOOK at women in a sexual light, and then complain that women are dressing sexually. No. Abandon that HEART and that frame of mind and realize that you can NOT stop the way that women dress and while I agree that Christian women shouldn’t be wearing THIS to church-
The PROBLEM is that when we start talking about HOW MUCH is too much (or how little is too little) there will be a VAST difference of opinions because Christian Men ARE strange beings (as are women) and everyone has different things that “set them off” if you will.
Is THIS too much?!
I think she’s definitely trying to seduce someone… those pants are form fitting and if she bent at all… all of that CLEVauuge!
Who gets to decide who is “too naked” … and “trying to make men stumble” ??? That’s the conversation I’d love to be in on. “Her boob is peeking out just a little too much… oops, the dress is just above her knee, she definitely wants to slut herself raw.”
Seriously… stop acting like you are so offended by “breasts” or like they’re forbidden or you can’t look at a woman with them and be tempted or something… It’s the 21st century for goodness sakes… Did you go see any of the movies this year or last? Did you not see this?!
Quickly boycott these movies immediately! Boobs, and CLEVAUGE every place we look! Tight fitting clothing andd… annnd… oh no… oh not this… anything but this… I… I can’t even…I can’t even CLOSE to can’t even… I am so far from evening…It can’t be it’s…
You might ask me “why” ? … “Why Lisa? Why are you so mad and so passionate and so bitter sounding about such a topic? Is it because YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU want to dress slutty in church?”
No… actually, it’s not. It’s because one time, I was basically made to feel ridiculous (by a fellow WOMAN btw) and as if I was trying to “seduce” men, or at least make them stumble by wearing what was essentially this,
Now, the sleeves were shorter, (cap sleeves) and the chest was a BIT more open (hard not to do with me as my chest is HUGE) as was the skirt, (just above my knee) but that’s not the point.
The point is that I thought that I looked “pretty”… not “sexy” or “trying to seduce men”…
This is why this whole “what’s too little” thing is dangerous after a point… yes, we should (as women) not dress like we are going clubbing to church… but what’s the point in making a woman feel badly if she is dressed like the above?
Seriously… men… can you stop with the “act”…? You’re fooling no one. Your heart is impure so you can’t stand that women come to church in something that you glare at every single day… you only notice it because IN CHURCH is where the holy spirit dwells, and that’s when you start to feel guilty… honestly? I’d actually start asking why it is that the holy spirit isn’t guiding you OUTSIDE of church too like Job (who promised not to look upon a woman… not “only if she was dressed modestly…” period). Because I think that THAT’S the real question.