I’m Sorry that Alton Sterling Died…

You guessed it, there is a “major BUT” coming.

BUT …

He might have had it coming.

Before you go ape on me and start throwing the racism card left and right and saying that I wasn’t there, I didn’t know, etc etc…

Please understand something… Whenever a black man is killed by police who happen to be white, this nation goes into a tizzy. The BLM people go nuts, riots happen in the streets, people start crying because the “law” has failed them and every single time, it seems that NO ONE does any research into the matter.

Meanwhile, as the courts find the police not guilty, suddenly all of facebook, social media, and the internet cry, want to punch things, and talk about how the “justice system failed them” … “racism is still alive” they say. “MICHAEL BROWN!” they remind, etc etc etc.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/post-partisan/wp/2015/03/16/lesson-learned-from-the-shooting-of-michael-brown/

<sigh> And I never know where to begin with this…

It’s such a delicate topic because as I have tried to state several times now on mass media, the MEDIA loves to make every time a black man dies about “race” … HE WAS KILLED BECAUSE HE WAS BLACK!!! #BLACKLIVESMATTER!!! #RACISMALIVE AND WELL…

It’s a hard topic. It’s hard, it’s sad, and it’s hard to truly say what you want to say because emotions are high, tensions are high, and a lot of it is due to the freaking media who immediately tells EVERYONE the murder happened because *big underline and underscore and asterisks* “HE WAS BLACK AND THE KILLERS WERE WHITE”… the killers, not the police… the killers. Wording matters my friends.

Know what else matters? The truth.

Let me just say first off that I am sorry that a man died. I’m sorry because I am sorry that ANYONE dies, ever.

I love black people, I love white people, and I know it’s hard to hear someone who’s “white” talk about and criticize the actions of someone who’s “black” … but that’s because of the fact that race DOES matter whether we like it or not.

The same people pushing for the racist thing are the same people who want to remind us that over 300 years ago, there were black slaves, conveniently forgetting to mention that A, black people themselves were the first slave traders, B, black people owned black slaves themselves, C, there were OTHER slaves too (Irish, etc), D, we covered it when a WHITE person was shot by police and killed (btw, this happens right and left too but NO ONE reports it, which tells you that the media WANTS to inflame the whole blacks against whites thing…) and E, HALF OF THE COUNTRY disagreed with the idea of slaves to begin with! There was a war? Remember?

No, I do NOT think that racism is as prevalent as everyone makes it sound. Why? We have a black president, we’ve had a black secretary of state (Colin Powell, Condoleezza Rice), we have black supreme court justice members, black entertainers, black scientists.

I think that the PROBLEM lies in the media who wants us to immediately feel sorry for a community of people for false reasons.

I have a large heart for people of any color.

I DO NOT have a large heart for a black person who had a gun, was resisting arrest and had an extensive criminal history including sex with a minor/ sexual predator/ offender.

Yes, if you haven’t guessed, I’m referring to Alton Sterling.

Mr. Sterling, might have been black but I have a feeling looking over his sheet that the reason that he was killed wasn’t so much because he was black, as it was that he had a long standing history with the police and the law.

The Baton Rouge police KNEW this guy and NOT because he was pulled over often. But because he actually committed crimes, possessed hard drugs (ecstasy) carried weapons illegally, AND was sleeping with a minor (14 years old) when he was a 20 year old and then failing to register as a sex offender.

I REALLY hate that this guy died, and I mean that. (not sarcastic)… but this is what I know from the reports AND watching the video of his death now five or six times.

#1. The police knew this man well.
#2. They were called because SOMEONE knew that he had a gun (illegally).
#3. When police know that someone has a gun, they tend to not treat it as if the man is holding a kitten.
#4. When the police know the man has a gun on him, AND has a criminal history, AND is well known as a thug in the community, they are DEFINITELY not going to treat him as if he’s holding a kitten.
#5. The police were called BECAUSE someone reported that he (Mr. Sterling) threatened them with a gun.
#6. The police definitely knew he had a gun on him as it can be heard in the video. “He’s got a gun!”
#7. Mr. Sterling was NOT complying with police as they tell him multiple times to “get on the ground” and he does not. They have to tackle him. (remember, they know he has a gun as this was why they were called there.)
#8. Video evidence suggests that Mr. Sterling was reaching for one of the police man’s tasers while on the ground as (even though it’s a bit unintelligible), it appears that one of them says, “He’s going for the taser.”
#9. In the video, they repeatedly tell him to “stop moving/ stay still” (Remember, they’ve ALREADY had to tackle him because he wasn’t complying) and it’s pretty obvious that he (Mr. Sterling) is attempting to move his right arm (partially under the car) around, giving the police reason to believe that he might have been GOING for his gun to retaliate.
#10. AGAIN… this man was KNOWN by police as a criminal.
#11. It’s pretty obvious by the enormous, “FU**!!!” that the cop says at the end of the video that he’s shocked and horrified by what just happened. He didn’t plan on killing this guy and he didn’t expect it to go down that way.

Now, if you were WHITE and you were a known criminal and had an illegal weapon on you, and a history as a sex offender, I would have said, “Hey, don’t commit crimes, don’t have sex with a minor and when the police ask you to comply, get on the ground and STOP MOVING… do it…”

You know what I’d love? I’d love for America to get AS ANGRY at the killing of unborn babies as they are sitting behind their computers judging every police shooting as “racism” and starting riots over it. That’s what I’d love. #notgoingtohappen

It’s that simple if you’re white… but if you’re black and I write something like this? I’m racist… -_-

I guess if I lose friends over this, then it says that people are more emotional than they are willing to consider some facts and I can’t help any more. 😦 officer_gun_police_shooting_ostill

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I don’t hate Muslims

In light of recent events (And I’m specifically speaking about the absolute TRAGEDY and horror of Saturday and the events at Pulse with the many wounded and dead of the LGBT community, God bless you all).

A LOT has happened both on the internet and on Facebook that has caused a massive stir.

People are (understandably) UPSET. Innocent people died who’s only crime was “loving who they wanted to love.” and “going for a fun night at their favorite gay club”… truly, truly, truly a sad day.

I have barely (myself) had time to process the whole thing because my birthday was last week, I have been planning on going on a small trip myself, and I have been TERRIBLY sick the last few days. But the more that I think about it, the more it makes my blood boil.

Being a conservative Christian does NOT make it any “easier” on me. I don’t have ANY sense of “told you so” or “they deserved that” … in fact, all that I have is grief. Grief for the victims. Grief for families. Grief for the LIFE LOST to pure and utter ignorance, homophobia annnnnd, (yes) Islam.

I keep posting things about Islam and against Islam on my facebook but the problem is that it continues to fall on deaf ears and people who ignorantly do NOT wish to believe, see, or consider. To me, this is fear. Fear that questioning a growing (rapidly) ideology or putting it under scrutiny = racism or Islamophobia.

I wish that I could be 100 percent clear to these people who believe that I am ignorant, racist, or hateful.

I do not hate Muslims. I live in an area where if I go out in public, I see 3-4 Muslim or Muslim families every day. I smile at them, wave, nod and feel no sense of “terror” that they might “do something to me.”

A few weeks ago, I saw a Muslim family on the street, asking for money. I pulled right up alongside them, handed them a few dollars (what I had), took his hand said, “God bless you.” I DO NOT HATE Muslims. I did this a few years ago too, when a poor Muslim woman and her son were out on the streets near my home. My compassion for them was NO less because they were Muslim. I used to get my favorite meal from a Muslim restaurant in which the Koran was quoted right above the man who took my money. ^_^

I believe that their religion and the dedication that they have to it is rich in a lot of history and that there are MANY MANY MANY Muslims who are great people. Look at Malala, the beautiful Muslim girl who stands up for women, education and freedom of belief, and strength. Look at the video (I tried to find the link, but can not) of the Muslim woman and Jewish man speaking in the airport in which she blatantly states that she believes in one God, but that she also believes that EVERYONE should have the right to believe what they want and worship as they see fit! 😀 Or the Jewish, Christian, and Muslim men who are living together to go to college in PEACE! AND they are friends! 😀

muslim family
This is beautiful. We all (Christians, Muslims and Jews) believe in ONLY one way/ one God… AND YET! We can live together, love together, and exist together. ^_^ I have sat down to pray for Muslims when they needed it, asked for it, whatever. I have also tried my best to help any of them in progressive ways. I actually purchased my wedding dress from a Muslim family. ^_^

NOW… let’s get to my “hate” … (so to speak) …

I think that America is in a time frame where we need to understand a few things…

The first of which is that everyone is absolutely terrified. Whether we like it or not, we are terrified. That terror might express itself in different ways, but it is terror whether you’re like me and you post things that are anti Islamic, or you don’t speak out because you’re afraid, or you simply parrot the liberal side every time a bunch of innocent people die and quickly rush to defend Islam and say, “NAMALT” (Not all Muslims are like that)…

I think that we really need to ask ourselves what the problem is when SEVERAL members of the LBGT movement are SLAUGHTERED by a terrorist and the FIRST thing we do is rush to defend Islam.

We live in a time where everyone is EXTREMELY ready to defend, protect, and pet Islam after massive acts of terrorism, but society holds Christianity in ETERNAL contempt over not baking a wedding cake, and / or leaving a bad tip.

Society is WILLING to conflate the WBBC with Christianity (What… 40 people? Maybe?) Who are a CULT (they really have nothing to do with Christianity) and hold them up as a standard of radical Christianity then they are to scrutinize THOUSANDS of Islamic terrorists and conflate terrorism with Islam…

Something… is… wrong…

If we were talking about something else, anyone with a brain would see a massive societal brainwashing here. Brainwashing or FEAR… one or the other. Otherwise, it absolutely makes no sense.

It’s obvious by the political and societal climate against Christians that if “Christians” had members who walked into a bar and shot up 50 + homosexuals that the entire NATION would be crying for laws against us, laws keeping us out of their “spaces” … etc etc. Maybe imprisonment, etc…

The “hate” against people who wouldn’t bake a wedding cake (when if you actually read the report and the ruling, you’ll see there was a LOT more to it than that) is palpable, while the “hate” against terrorism, which continues to hurt, maim, and kill innocent people is a shrug and a “NAMALT.”

Oh sure, since THIS time, the attack was against LBGT people there’s a BIT more of a stir… but it gets me wondering… It really does…

At what point is it okay for us to question an ideology?

It’s LITERALLY fact that you can research for yourself that over 28, 000 TERRORIST attacks have occurred world wide SINCE 9/11, all Islamic, almost all heard shouting “Allahu Akbar” and all killing tens, hundreds, and THOUSANDS of innocent people who had no war and/ or vendetta against Islam. They got up, went out, and didn’t know that that day wold be the day that they breathed their last.

No religion in the HISTORY of the world and CERTAINLY not the modern world has bred terrorism like Islam… and at some point, the world has to ask… why? And then we have to begin to ask “What can be done about it?”

If we’re going to conflate “all gun owners” as being “bad people who want to shoot everyone up” … why are we not even allowed to CONSIDER the possibility that Islam breeds terrorists?

If you’re even a LITTLE up to date, all you know is what’s going on HERE… in AMERICA… You don’t even know about the literally HUNDREDS of Jewish, Christian and innocent Muslims who are killed by OTHER Muslims in the Middle east.

So we have to ask… why does Islam breed extremists? If you’re not allowed to ask that question, or you can’t admit to it, or seek it out… maybe it’s time to ask “WHY”?

I ask that God bless, PROTECT (as the most important part) and provide us with more people like Raheel Raza… an ISLAMIC woman who is willing to not only admit that Islam is Extreme, but points out HOW… (In this video)  https://youtu.be/pSPvnFDDQHk

And people like Brigette Gabriel, responsible for THIS speech-

NOT because I want Muslims who are innocent thrown in JAIL, NOT because I want to send all Muslims “back where they came from” but because until the AMERICAN POPULATION and the government REALIZES that there is a problem with Islam the same way that (as she said) there was a problem with the nazis (which no one saw that early on either) we can do ANYTHING to protect the American people or the world from terrorism because we are too busy trying to defend the “peaceful majority” when we are not TALKING about the peaceful majority, and we do not conflate the obvious and that is that Islam BREEDS TERRORISTS unlike any other religion the world has ever seen.

As the last sticking point…

I see a lot of people talking and saying things like, “We just need to stop hatred” “We just need more LOVE…”

Well, firstly, the REAL and TRUE love is Christ’s because He is truth and is the only one who laid down His life WILLINGLY for all of humanity no matter what they did… (something that none of us could ever do ) And secondly, love does NOT STOP terrorism. It might if you are able to be in the presence of a terrorist and change their mindset… but in every situation where that was attempted, almost ALL of that failed know why? Because terrorists are not interested in negotiating, they’re not interested in “love” or “tolerance” they only want one thing and that is to die for their “belief” … and their “belief” is actually quite sick when you dig a little further in. (77 virgins with constant arousal and always hardened nipples, etc…) This isn’t even SAYING anything about the fact that MOST of the Islamic faith is not “radical” but still believes extreme things (like Raheel Raza points out). Like that they have sexual rights over non-muslim women, etc… which has caused the MASS rape and terror issues in other countries including the “game” in which fifty or so muslim men sexually attack ONE woman so that no one else can even fight to get to her.

So, LOVE is not what these people are after.

/end.

PS… I have not watched this yet, but Milo Yianopoulos ( A GAY MAN ) speaking out

Yes, I’m being a jerk, and yes, I’m sorry.

I told someone last night that I should write a “FAQ” about my illness and how I feel and why I am so upset with life and with God recently… Here are some common questions and thoughts from others and my answers. So here it goes.

(THIS BLOG POST CONTAINS A GRAPHIC IMAGE OF A WOMAN’S ANATOMY… IT’S A DRAWING… NOT a REAL photo. It’s akin to something you’d see in a school book explaining parts and pieces. If you think this will upset or trigger you, don’t read any further.)

1. Are you okay?

A. No. Quite frankly, I haven’t been “okay” for about 3 years now.

2. Have you seen a doctor?

A. About 20… yes. Lots of $$$, lots of time wasted to basically be told that not much can be done for me.

3. There’s nothing that can be done?

A. There are “things that I can do” to “possibly lessen the pain” but it’s a day to day thing.

4. I couldn’t do it.

A. I have no choice…

5. Have you heard of “this” medicine/ drug?

A. Yes. I’ve pretty much heard of “all of them.” Occasionally, someone says something that I haven’t heard of, but it’s rare.

6. Can you have sex?

A. Occasionally, but about 95% of the time it’s VERY painful and can not last long.

Sad couple having an argument

7. What’s the pain like?

A. Think sunburn… on my genitals.

8. Geez, when did this all start?

A. https://lkjslain.wordpress.com/2014/08/02/hello-my-name-is-lisa-and-im-a-chronic-pain-sufferer/

9. Where exactly IS the pain? I don’t understand.

A. (WARNING, graphic image below. I apologize for it, but there’s no way to ANSWER this question without finding a drawing and highlighting. I have reddened the areas that I most often experience pain. AGAIN this is JUST a drawing.)

Vulva

10. What is this condition called?

A. Vulvar Vestibulitis. And/ or Vulvodynia.

11. I’m dumb, what does that mean?

A. Basically, vestibulitis is when the pain ONLY affects the vestibule (pictured above), however, Vulvodynia means that sometimes it hurts in other places too.

12. Why is there a big red mark on the upper area? Isn’t that like your stomach?

A. Because it turns out that I might ALSO have IC. (interstitial cystitis)

13. What is that?

A. It’s a painful bladder disease that usually goes hand in hand with Vestibulitis and Vulvodynia as well as pelvic floor dysfunction, IBS, and a slew of other things. 😛

14. Are you angry?

A. Irate. I was one of those “weird people” who actually WAITED for sex for marriage. I wasn’t some “angel with a halo” but I never did that. That’s not to mention that pretty much nothing in my life is working out or HAS worked out, so literally I just sit here and be depressed and hurt a lot (physically and emotionally)

15. You should just stop complaining, it could be a lot worse.

A. I’m sure it could be. In fact, every time that I’ve thought this, it eventually DOES get a LOT worse! 😀

16. There’s some reason you’re going through this.

A. No s**t, Sherlock. There’s “some” reason that anyone goes through “anything”… in fact, if there weren’t a God, it’d still be happening for a reason. Unfortunately, I just haven’t figured out what that is yet.

17. How long have you been going through this?

A. Almost 3 years.

18. Have you tried… ________

A. Yes. I’m not trying to be rude, but yes… We “chronic pain sufferers” have a very difficult time NOT trying to figure ourselves out. We become little scientists. I have spent countless hours READING, TRYING TO FIND, RESEARCHING… I have tried a LOT of things. Not everything mind you… but everything lol.

19. You know, Apple Cider Vinegar is supposed to do wonders.

A. IT REALLY IS! :D:D:D And I drink it probably 5 times a week! 😀 Yes, the real stuff with the “mother”

20. How’s your marriage?

A. Suffering. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if it doesn’t last, but I am still hopeful.

21. You know, I think you hold a lot of anger and bitterness in your heart.

A. You’re probably right. YOU TRY being in this situation for almost three years and NOT being angry and bitter.

22. I think you’re sick because of _______ ______ ______

A. Ge, you know, you’re probably right. I’ll get right on forgiving every last person who ever hurt me, saying 30 hail Mary’s, eating only fish, and dirt, and being kind, loving and compassionate to everyone I meet. LOL… Oh WAIT! I am ALREADY serving everyone that I know. In fact, so much so that almost EVERYONE comes before I do! 😀 -_-

23. Have you read _____________________________

A. Spare me. I’m not trying to be mean, but seriously… spare me. I have “read” “Listened to” “Heard” ETC ETC ETC

24. Well, if you’re going to have that attitude, nothing is going to change.

A. Look… I have and WILL read your darn books and listen to your tapes… frankly, I’ve heard pretty much nothing new about the situation… and in the end, all I ever get is “there’s some reason you’re going through this, and God is good, and you obviously haven’t tried everything”… -_- Yeah, thanks…

25. You need to pray and read your bible more.

A. I couldn’t agree more… but God doesn’t have a “heal Lisa quota.” He’s not sitting in heaven saying, “Lisa will be healed ONCE she reads all of this and that and says some prayers.” BTW, I am working on that anyways.

26. This whole post sounds really angry.

A. Honestly? I’m having a bad few days… Part of my problem is that I have been in “flare” pain now for about a month and I have seen very little relief. Everything hurts and I am just tired. I can barely sleep at night. So, I REALLY DO apologize for sounding angry, depressed, scared, and anxious. I am and there’s nothing more to it.

27. You know, you can do “other things” other than sex to “keep hubby happy”

A… Yes, because what I want is to “keep him happy” while I sit here and be in pain. Can you imagine? Also, being “aroused” hurts sometimes so I avoid even “giving” pleasure often. AND… There are also other physical issues that do not aid this situation well. BTW, also… it’s EXTREMELY shameful and difficult to be in the middle of. You feel like everything is wrong with you. You’re “broken.”

images (1)

29. Marriage isn’t about sex, you can have intimacy other ways…

A. Yes, but marriage is HARD when one person is in sexual pain all of the time.

30. Were you raped?

A. No. But I did have some traumatic stuff happen when I was young that honestly? Mentally makes this situation VERY difficult on me.

31. Well, you just have all of the excuses, don’t you?

A. I don’t have “all of the excuses”… I WAS SUPPOSED to be able to have sex! The bible even talks about not “denying” one another… well, what about this? How am I supposed to justify my thoughts on this? -_-

32. Maybe you just need to relax / take a break.

A. Yup… from life. But that’s not going to happen. Actually, I have to get a job soon. -_- *supposed to avoid stress*

33. God wants you to be healed, He WANTS to heal you and your marriage… Why can’t you accept that?

A. I HAVE accepted that. I have accepted it multiple times and then long periods go by where things just get worse… If He WANTED to do it, He’d have done it.

34. You know, God will never give you more than you can handle. So you can probably handle this.

A. You know, thanks, brosif… Hey, real quickly, do me a favor and tell me what verse that is! 😛 (hint, it’s not in the bible… the whole ‘god will never give you more…’ nonsense is just that… nonsense. The scripture you’re looking for is 1 Cor 10:13, which states simply that He will provide a way out of temptation)

35. Well, there’s a reason.

A. Yup… now we start all over again.

—- SIDE NOTE / PS…
Doctors are pretty sure that on top of everything else I have PCOS too… so I might not be able to conceive either… <sigh> life.

A Bit of Truth, I hated Negan.

And it seems that I am the only one/ the odd man out and that’s okay.

But I thought about it all last night and I just had to make a post about it.

The world stood still Sunday night as pretty much the most watched television show aired it’s final episode of it’s sixth season running since 2010. The Walking Dead.

Now, I will state that I am coming from a place of already disliking a lot of things that have happened this season. I felt that in regards to the world that has been created and the general rules set up for the show things have just taken some weird as all get out turns. Turns that in all reality don’t make a whole lot of sense, and if they do, or could be explained, the writers have chosen not to do so. (Some of my issues include but are not limited to – the burst of people all in one area, the Richonne thing and how it happened when five minutes ago, Rick was drooling over someone else and then she got eaten alive…in front of him… the sort of rut that they’re in that seems to be repeating itself with the way certain characters behave, Carol’s… melt…down?)

And guess what? I still like the show, and I am still interested to see where it’s going. So all of you hardcore fans who will defend it to death, don’t worry, I’m not “spanking your baby”… I am merely stating that (perhaps) as a writer I see the issues that they are facing and I understand some of them as this is season six… Many and most shows don’t even make it this far and once they do, they are bound to start having shakier legs to stand on. ESPECIALLY when those legs are always running from the gross and gooky undead. XD

But anyways, let’s get back to the man of the hour (and a half >_> … or rather, the man of the entire season)… NEGAN!!!

SPOILERS BELOW if you have NOT seen the finale yet. ————————-Negan

You know, we all knew that it was coming. We knew because we know the comics and we knew because heck, they’ve been hinting at it for what like… ten episodes or something now? Fifteen? I’ve lost count. ANYWAYS, we felt it…

And I’ll admit, I was scared when our beloved crew ran into a giant gang comprised of mostly “men” … you know, just like casually whistling a tune. That crap was freekay! But when they stopped whistling and the spot light was turned on and they were all, “HEY HEY HERE COMES NEGAN!!!” I was actually severely let down. I knew WHO I was expecting because I knew who was cast, so his overall appearance wasn’t a shock to me, (although I have to be honest, I personally would have gone with someone who was far more “built” and square in the face,) but when he opened his mouth, everything after, “Hi, I’m Negan” fell entirely flat for me.

Womp womp wompppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp…

I know, I know. So many people are going “What?! How! It was so scary! The tension was palpable! The air was so thick you could slice it with a knife!”

Well, yes… And honestly, I think that that was the only thing that actually “made Negan scary” …

I realized after watching it and after my heart had been pounding nearly out of my chest for the first 30ish seconds that he was on screen that the MORE that he was on screen, the more that I didn’t feel that afraid of him… in fact, the more that I was actually okay with him… and even a little comfortable with him.

The SCARY part actually had very little to do with him. It had to do with the general feeling of “no escape” “Maggie’s hurt/ hurting” “Glenn is terrified” “surrounded” “nighttime, so harder to see” “everyone on their knees” “weird whistlers” etc…

No, actually I want to say that after he started to speak, I truly found “Negan” to not be all that intimidating at all. He sort of lumbered around with this walk as if maybe he was a bit drunk. (maybe he was lol) and said… well, let’s be honest… he said a LOT… Like,  a WAY lot… Like… a lot a lot… Like… so much that I was actually bored towards the end.

I mean, I wonder at times who’s fault things like extensive monologuing actually are? The writers? The directors? The multiple times they took a shot? The actor? Did Jeffrey Dean Morgan say, “Sure, I’ll play your Negan, but only if you give me ten straight minutes of talking at the end of the finale?” … what?

I felt (overall) that his character was a bust. I was more afraid of his “lackey” (the balding guy who introduced him) then I was of Jeffrey Dean Morgan… And honestly? I feel that this was a BIG mistake on the writer/director’s behalf.

In my opinion, when you’re going to introduce the “baddiest bad bad dude of them all,” you do NOT give your audience “time” to get comfortable with him. All of that hype, only to be met with several minutes of talking and saying the same crap over and over again.

And the fact that in his first few lines he said something about pee pee? Really?! “Pee pee city” ? I think it was? I get the intent, I really do. The intent was to make everyone seem infantile and fearful. But when you are the guy with the barbed bat and like… I donno 60 other beefy whistling dudes to back you up if something goes awry, I don’t think that all of the peepee poopoo talk is necessary. >_> It’s pretty evident at that point.

Then came the longest freaking monologue in bad dude history… Like, DUDE… this guy just talked in circles for several minutes. I lost count of how many times he said, “I’m not going to kill you BUT…” “I’m not going to kill you I need workers…” “I’m not going to kill you but… pee pee city…” “I’m not going to kill you but…” “I’m NOT going to KILL you but…” “erm nert gerrin’ ter ker ryer berrrrrt…” >_> *smile smile, smirk, grin*… Yeah, I wasn’t having it.
Negan3

Negan1

I honestly think this dude would have been more frightening if he had said a few words then just flat out began swinging out of no where.

But that’s just me. Midway through his monologue I stopped being afraid/ heart stopped pounding and I started really just being confused… “What? He’s still talking? Does he need to prove himself or something? Again.. .there’s like 60 beefy whistlers backing him up… heh… he doesn’t really seem that threatening anymore if he needs 60 dudes and he needs to monologue for 10 minutes straight and talk in circles…”

And no offense to Jeffrey Dean Morgan… I’m sure he’s a nice guy… but that’s the problem. I’m SURE that he’s a nice guy… I honestly didn’t feel that the delivery of many of his lines made him threatening. I felt like everything from his body language down to his tones and his smiling/ smirking felt off. This is acting 101… this is why method acting is so important to actors ESPECIALLY those who want to be “the baddies” … Unfortunately, having done method acting now, I can often tell when people are “putting on a show” for the camera. Jeffrey isn’t really a bad guy and I can tell that because I didn’t believe for one second that he actually wanted to hurt any of them after a few minutes.

Negan4
(THIS was more scary…)

I recall when my acting coach use to tell us to play the intention and said things like, “intimidate them” and the person who was doing the “intimidating” would get close and say something mildly offensive. My coach would come over, press the two body to body, and have them glare at one another still pressed together. Uncomfortable? Exactly.

I am hoping and praying that they do something else with this guy because at this time? He’s a really non-threatening monologer in my book >_>

negan5

OUT –

You need to shut up on Facebook

Yeah, total click bait.

But related, I assure you.

I just want to point out something that I am learning more and more in regards to FB and social media in general.

social media

Now, this doesn’t apply to like groups, or open forums where it’s expected however, imagine this scenario:

You’re at a party and at this party, you know like three people. Let’s say that you are having a conversation with your friend about something you believe in. Let’s make it religion. Whether you’re Catholic, Christian, Hindu, whatever… And you’re having a bit of a back and forth, but it’s cool because you’re friends.

THEN someone comes into the conversation that your friend knows… from high school… and is like, “Yeah, that Jesus guy was a jerk… I mean, He’s not even God or anything. He was just a zombie Christ…”

Just… really ruins everything, doesn’t it?

Now look, I’m not saying that if you post something, you’re not in a way ASKING for someone to come along and say something, but I am learning more and more in regards to myself how RUDE it is to comment in a thread or on someone else’s that I DO NOT KNOW’S comment.

We don’t do that in real life, so why do we feel it necessary to do it on social media? All it does is fuel a debate that, in the end, doesn’t really change the other person’s mind and takes away from our life in general …

Here’s an example of what I’m talking about-

*JJR posts an article on politics with his own commentary.*
BB: *makes a comment that debates the article*
JJR: *replies back*
BB: *Replies back with facts, etc…*
—— ANA jumps into the conversation with scathing reply about truth and facts and rambles for half an hour. ANA doesn’t KNOW BB, she/he just feels the need to set BB straight… What ensues is a three hour conversation in which no one changes their mind.—

OFTEN in the past, I have been ANA…

Now again, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t comment on a friend’s article and have a friend debate or whatever, but we don’t really need to start engaging all of JJR’s friends to “school them” through facebook. It just really doesn’t go anywhere and let’s face it, we don’t like it when it happens to US… We don’t like to be “ANA’d” – it takes away from our conversation with JJR and if you’re anything like me, every time you see that little notification at the top, you have a miniature anxiety attack. What has ANA said NOW? What will I have to PROVE? How can I REFUTE everything that they’re saying? What if I CAN’TTTT???

I’ve found a few tools that have really helped me.

1. ABSOLUTELY making a decision not to engage any further. If a person replies… don’t respond. In fact, don’t even read the comment. FIRST, let the person know that you will not be READING their comment back in your final reply. Then DON’T. Do not be tempted into it. The moment you read the comment, you’ll HAVE to reply. You know you will. It’s in our nature.

2. Find the “unfollow” button or “turn off notifications for this post” and then leave it alone.

3. If you have to say something, try and be kind, or at least give the benefit of the doubt/ be skeptical. I suggest this when dealing with anyone online that you don’t know. You don’t know why they believe what they believe and what they’re going through. They really don’t need your pride or arrogance on the computer screen.

images

Dear Men, yes… you

Dear you,

Sit down, pour a glass of coffee, juice, or whatever your preferred drink is. We’ll be here a minute.

dear mendear men21

If no one ever told you, I think you need to know.

I love you. All of you. I don’t harbor illness or resentment towards you because of what a “few” of you might have done the same way that I try not to harbor illness or resentment towards women because of what a few of “them” might have done.

I want to openly state a few things –

dear men17dear men 22

I admire you. You are a  wonderful, important gender. In fact, your importance is paramount. 

Maybe you don’t realize it, but your God given role is help guide, and teach. You will one day be the head of your household, and the husband of your wife, and the father of your children. This is absolutely 100percent important because it’s an encouragement to you.

Be strong in the word, and in the Lord. Be strong in care, in discipline, and teaching. And be strong for your wife. She needs you. She needs you to be sturdy, supportive and in awe of her all of the time.

You are so, so, so important. You are the keystone, you are the foundation. So whatever is making you feel rocky right now, whatever you suffer emotionally, physically, or mentally, get a hold on it, and be the warrior of your life.

dear men18dear men21
You are a strong, strong breed. 

Unlike women, you learn from a very young age that your emotions and feelings are next to nothing. That you should “Stop crying” and “take it like a man” … I apologize for this. For every time a woman has laughed or looked at you for having feelings.

You’re human and you can have all of the feelings and emotions that you need to have. YOU CAN BREAK DOWN… I will still believe in you.

You go to work for hours on end often without complaint to feed, supply for, and provide for yourself and (if now, or when the time comes) a family as well. I want to thank you for your dedication to this system. Without it, the family unit crumbles (And no, I don’t mean to say that men can’t be ‘house husbands’ or that women CAN NOT work).

You are allowed to cry. You are allowed to “go for a run”, you are allowed to hit a punching bag until your knuckles are bleeding and you’re blue in the face if you need to express yourself.

You CAN do it.
I apologize for any time a woman OR a man whether your mother or father, sister or brother, or anyone else in your life made you feel like you were not able to, not manly enough, or just incapable.

You ARE capable, you ARE manly enough, and you ARE able.

Don’t let some big shot, parental figure, or feminist tell you who you are. You are you, and you can and should go for your dreams.

dear men1

You can and should PAINT, WRITE POETRY, SEW, COOK…
OR
WIELD A SWORD, PLAY SOCCER, BOX, SHOOT HOOPS
OR
PLAY THE VIOLIN, SURF… etc

You do what YOU do. Don’t let anyone tell you that that’s not appropriate, or not “manly”. You can, and you are able.

Dear men2

You are NOT just a money maker, eating machine, video game player.
While on your surface that might be what we see ^_^, underneath you are a complex, wonderful person JUST like women (Although women are definitely a bit harder to understand.)

dear men4

You are NOT the scapegoat. 
I apologize over and over and over and a hundred times over for every time this stupid freaking society has made “everything” seem like men’s faults.

Yes, men are to blame for a lot. But women are to blame for a lot too. People in general are just to “blame” and I hate it that I live in a world where it’s “men’s faults” and we call men “dicks” but the word “cunt” is sexist, misogynistic, etc… I know that was graphic, I apologize, I’m making a point.

We blame men and put their genitals and manhood down all the time, but can’t even touch that area in women… double standards galore.

dear men16

You DESERVE – 
Love. Yes, yes you do. Despite all of your mistakes, failures, illnesses, insecurities, and self loathing, YOU DESERVE LOVE. You deserve it, you deserve it, you deserve it. Christ thinks so, I am not one to argue with him.

Sex. Yes, yes you do. You deserve sex. You deserve a woman’s touch, caress and JOY (yes JOY) to please you. Sex is not something that is a “prize” at the end of the day for being “good” … you’re not a “dog” … you are a sexual being who deserves love, and sex.

You do NOT deserve to be in a relationship in which your wife doesn’t do a thing for you, doesn’t cook you a meal, clean your house, or talks about how a “real man would…” no, shut up Jezzabel. YOU ARE a real man! You deserve servitude because you ARE a servant unto her. You do not deserve a woman who uses sex as a bartering tool every time (there are always exceptions to this, if it’s a game, if she’s sick, etc). Sex is passion, desire and intimacy, and you deserve to give, and take. That’s what sex is. You do not deserve a woman who doesn’t work, doesn’t do anything, gripes at you about everything, and starts in about the patriarchy all the time. YOU DESERVE BETTER. YOU ARE BETTER.

Dear men 14

It doesn’t matter if you’re black, white, short, tall, fat, skinny, nerdy, geeky, autistic, balding, clean shaven, big bearded, blue eyed, black eyed, brown eyed, green eyed, IT DOES NOT MATTER.

You deserve love, sex, companionship, and friendship.

dear men6

You DESERVE PEACE… 

Don’t let anyone tell you what a “real man” is… a real man is you. YOU ARE A MAN. (to be fair to this statement though, don’t be a deadbeat/ take it for granted lol)

You deserve to be praised. That’s right, praised. OH NO! That must mean that women do NOT deserve to be praised! No, I did not say that. What I said was that MEN deserve to be praised. Because you really do. You work, you play, you sacrifice your time, feelings, personal space, and life for others.

YOU DESERVE to play video games. 
Yes, you do. DO NOT be pushy with this one as it will take away from your family and friends, but you should absolutely get your kicks a few times a week, or for a few minutes a day slaying dragons, beating up the bad guy, BEING the bad guy, or stopping terrorist attacks. I know, it makes you feel good. You NEED to accomplish and slay as a man, and I don’t hold that against you at all. ^_^ (I’ll play too). Don’t abuse this, but you absolutely deserve it.

dear men7dear men10

You DESERVE peace.

dear men 15

To walk on the beach alone once in a while. To have a “man cave” where you watch movies in a dark room and drink a beer. To have a side room full of your artistic endeavors. To turn your garage into a tool space and drill holes into things.

You deserve to sit and take a breather and NOT be being asked to do something.

dear men 19

My heart has always been for men. I’ve always had a rather soft spot for them, this is what led me away from feminism. Recognizing that men are not only swept under the rug often, but they’re not taken seriously, not truly explored, or truly appreciated for just being MEN…

dear men20

I don’t hold it against you that you’re the stronger gender. I don’t hold it against you that you’re visual and think women are “hot.” I don’t hold it against you that you’re aggressive at times. I don’t hold it against you that you need to “prove” yourself. (although jus’ sayin’ in a perfect world, you wouldn’t need to) I don’t hold it against you that sometimes you need to ride on top of moving vehicles. I don’t hold it against you that sometimes your famous last words are “I can do that! Hold my beer!” … You’re just you… We’re different, you’re different, you’re interesting, unique’, and wonderful. YOU ARE WONDERFUL.

It was brought to my attention early on in life that we are doing SOMETHING wrong… Men are the highest on the suicide rate, (YOUNG men 😥 ) Men die earlier than women (I think proving that men take care of women and not themselves as well), men are often screwed in divorce cases (with women, their children, etc).

dear men13

Dear men, 
You are not stupid. TV,  literature, and entertainment often portrays men as the more “stupid” of the two genders. Just because you don’t understand everything that a woman does does NOT make you stupid. You’re just different, and often you rely on a woman for “house things.”

You’re actually smart. In fact, book wise, most of you are MUCH smarter than the average woman ever will be and I applaud you. Seriously. It means AMAZING things that you are able to be so intelligent and book smart. Women are often relationship smart, that’s why we need each other. ^_^

dear men 13

Dear men,
Whatever stage you are at in your life, there is ALWAYS more. You’re not too old, you’re not too young, you’re not too skinny, you’re not too fat, you’re not too autistic, your tourettes is not big enough to stop you from your next moment. Your next dream, your next failure (to learn from) your next step. You’re not too anything. Even if you’re on your deathbed, life is still in you, and you can say what you need to say and start anew. You can make it right, you can turn around, you can put the soda down and drink water, you can tell your wife/ girlfriend/ sister/ mom/ aunt/ grandma/ daughter that you love her and are sorry. You can ask Jesus to guide you more/further/farther/better. It is NOT too late. It never will be until your very last breath.

Dear men,
You’re mysterious, and I love that about you. I love learning what you have to say and listening to your opinion because it is VALID… and you always surprise me with everything that you’re capable of.

dear men12

DEAR MEN…
I’m sorry, you deserve FAR FAR FAR more credit.

dear men8

Dear men, 
I love you all and I’m PROUD of you. 

dear men 16

Lena Dunham is a child molester

And everyone needs to stop “praising” her.

She’s not “progressive” – nor is she for “equal rights”

lena

She’s someone who was given a “platform” and has used it and abused it in every way possible to berate and run her mouth about everyone that she disagrees with. And what’s more? She hasn’t even been good about doing it. She doesn’t disagree kindly, or in a way that moves anything along. She simply states things like, “I would punch every pro-lifer in the face” etc… Which is neither useful, progressive, or interesting. In fact, it isn’t even an argument or debate. It’s just rude, and shows you the context of who she really is.

She is a disgusting human being and frankly, I wish that other people would understand this and stop praising her for something that any other woman could have decided to do (go nude in her self made show, etc)

In her newly published collection of personal essays, Lena Dunham describes experimenting sexually with her younger sister Grace, whom she says she attempted to persuade to kiss her using “anything a sexual predator might do.” In one particularly unsettling passage, Dunham experimented with her six-year younger sister’s vagina. “This was within the spectrum of things I did,” she writes.

In the collection of nonfiction personal accounts, Dunham describes using her little sister at times essentially as a sexual outlet, bribing her to kiss her for prolonged periods and even masturbating while she is in the bed beside her. But perhaps the most disturbing is an account she proudly gives of an episode that occurred when she was seven and her sister was one. Here’s the full passage (p. 158-9):

“Do we all have uteruses?” I asked my mother when I was seven.

“Yes,” she told me. “We’re born with them, and with all our eggs, but they start out very small. And they aren’t ready to make babies until we’re older.” I look at my sister, now a slim, tough one-year-old, and at her tiny belly. I imagined her eggs inside her, like the sack of spider eggs in Charlotte’s Web, and her uterus, the size of a thimble.

“Does her vagina look like mine?”

“I guess so,” my mother said. “Just smaller.”

One day, as I sat in our driveway in Long Island playing with blocks and buckets, my curiosity got the best of me. Grace was sitting up, babbling and smiling, and I leaned down between her legs and carefully spread open her vagina. She didn’t resist and when I saw what was inside I shrieked.

My mother came running. “Mama, Mama! Grace has something in there!”

My mother didn’t bother asking why I had opened Grace’s vagina. This was within the spectrum of things I did. She just got on her knees and looked for herself. It quickly became apparent that Grace had stuffed six or seven pebbles in there. My mother removed them patiently while Grace cackled, thrilled that her prank had been a success.

 

(no, it’s actually truth from your own disgusting mouth)

Interestingly enough, Dunham’s sister grew up to be “queer” … take that as you will.

She has come against “men”for doing things that have not even been 100 percent proven yet, and THERE IT IS “she pursued her own sister like a sexual predator”

My point is that this is only the tip of the ice berg on this disgusting human being’s list of things that she’s done that are despicable.

I don’t care if her cyst exploded… Tell her to get off the stage –

FINDING THE ONE :D :D :D *hearts*

I don’t actually know how. LOL… I’m not an expert in relationship thinggssss

But I am a bit older than most of my friends, I’m married, and I have a bit of experience these arenas and I can tell you a few things about what I see today.

People believe a lot of stuff about love, romance and marriage that is just not true.

I’ve written about this before but sometimes it just needs to be repeated.

#1
If you want to find a spouse, you need to stop putting so much emphasis on “THE ONE” …

Your spouse isn’t Neo… or Jet Li. He/she is nobody, really. Or anybody.

For years now, the church has made the mistake of letting people put a LOT of emphasis on the idea of “the one” when it comes to a spouse. The idea that there’s some mystical person that God has set aside specifically FOR you… ooooohhhhh… There’s actually very little truth to this. In the bible, this happened very rarely and when it did happen, it was because major events in the world were about to unfold (like… the birth of Christ) and even in the situation of Christ, God simply CONFIRMED that they should be together. The bible doesn’t really indicate that He said, “Hey, see that girl over there? Marry Mary! Buah! Marry Mary…hehehe.” – First Joseph asked and then an angel appeared to them both.

The idea that there is a “one” is more an idea of “destiny” / “fate” which is far more mystical than Christian.

Now I’m not saying that you can’t feel that God is leading you to wait, or something, but I can tell you that a lot of people who have just decided to “wait” are usually the ones who are “scared” and end up waiting most of their living lives.

The one
(Pay attention… he wasn’t “THEE one”)

#2
Don’t for one moment believe that it’s not YOUR job to get prepared/ ready for a spouse before they show up.

I have seen far too many young people who want to get out of high school and find “the one.”

I’ve seen many more sit around and ask why God is not sending them “the one” when they are literally doing nothing productive with their lives at all.

I understand that in this day and age it’s difficult. I have a pretty major beef actually with the fact that the way society is set up, people can’t even CONSIDER getting married until around 25-30. I understand that this is frustrating. But USE THE TIME to become more appealing and ready for your future spouse and who knows, you might even meet them along the way.

Get a college education (no… don’t do that. Don’t listen to me, please) or get a job at least. Sure, start at McDonald’s if you have to, but always try to be moving up. Become a Shift Lead if you can’t find another job that’s better and then try for the Assistant Manager, etc. Who cares if that’s your job, if you make money, it’s a good one. (And trust me men, women are more concerned with the fact that men HAVE a “decent” job than they are that it’s at a restaurant or a Starbucks).

If you’re a guy? Get your life more together. Press into God more. Learn as many skills as you can with tools, weapons (why not?) Cooking some simple meals for yourself and (let’s be honest here,) Stop your porn addiction. I know how hard it is in this day and age with it being so accessible, trust me. But seriously, GET HELP for that. Because one of the biggest lies that the enemy wants to tell all single men is that “they’re doing it because they don’t have anyone and when they do it will stop.” There is not a SHRED of evidence that this stops after marriage, in fact in many cases it became worse and eventually led to other things (look at Josh Duggar, but he’s literally only one example) Every person that I have ever met who told themselves this lie is worse off now than they were when they got married. It’s a lie and it needs to be taken care of. Because the addiction is not about “your lack of partner” it’s about you liking porn.

If you’re  a girl. Do some similar things. Learn how to cook (big one, trust me ladies) Even if it’s some simple meals or things that you don’t need to do a lot of work for. I have some amazingly simple recipes that I can share some time consuming, some not that will keep your future husband at least a bit happy. Practice keeping your house clean, practice being kind to others. Babysit, etc. All things in preparation for being a wife/ mom. ALSO get a job, ALSO pursue dreams, etc.

DO NOT BE the person who sits around and plays video games 24/7 or even for four hours a day and expect that God is going to send you a wife/ husband.

#3. 
DATE.

FREAKING DATE. DATE A LOT. DATE OFTEN. DATE ALL OF THE FREAKING TIME.

WHY IS THIS A PROBLEM!?

I never understand this generation of people who think that there’s some kind of “shame” in dating. DO you “Kiss Dating Goodbye?” Well, DON’T! Maybe do it in the sense that you don’t serially “have relationships” but don’t stop DATING!

Here’s the thing. Dating is a GOOD thing. It helps you to understand who/ what you want in a person.

And the way you do it is this- You approach it as if you are going to “get to know someone”. You go out, have coffee, go to a movie, then you go with someone else. Then you go with someone else. You have close friends who may or may NOT eventually become relationships. DO NOT RUSH THINGS. Just date. Heck, date fifty times a month if you have to! No Kissing, no holding hands, no immediate talk of your future together, no acting like this is “A RELATIONSHIP IN THE MAKING” … just a date.

But seriously, don’t be afraid of it unless you know of a reason why you can’t do it. (I understand those and they are valid- you don’t have self control, etc). But if you can maintain a clear thought in your head about it “JUST GETTING TO KNOW RACHEL/ TAYLOR” then DO IT! Have fun and learn learn learn.

#4. 
Don’t be Afraid.

Those things that the devil tells you, “what if it doesn’t work out?” “What if he’s/she’s a weirdo?” “I don’t like THAT thing that they do!” … it’s a bunch of bullcrap. No one is going to be perfect and every last person is at risk for ANY NUMBER of things. You are literally never safe. You heard me. You ARE NOT SAFE.

Love is a risk, so is marriage, so is life, so is family, etc. The ONLY thing you can do is you.

Which leads me to

fear
#5.

Stop believing that things will be “good” when you find that person.

I hate to say it, but we put too much emphasis on “love” in this day and age. I’m not talking about TRUE love. I’m talking about the kind of love that you know about… the one from the movies… the one from Game of Thrones. The one from every Chick Flick on the planet. That kind of love that’s really… well, let’s call it what it is … lust. Or emotions. Or fleeting feelings of attraction and infatuation.

All of which are symptoms of / part of love (or can be). But they are not REAL love. REAL love is HARD WORK and I’m sorry if no one ever told you that, but it’s the truth. Real love not only takes time, and your best behavior, but it WILL NOT grow unless you nurture it, feed it, strengthen it, and WORK WORK WORK for it.

You can not marry someone and expect love to just “happen” or “stick around”…

REAL love is sleeping next to a man (or woman hehehehe) who snores and keeps you up all night. Real love is cleaning up their vomit when they’re sick as a dog and their head is in the toilet. Real love is being with them when they get fat and agreeing with yourself that you’re going to stick by them anyways. REAL love is holding them when they’re afraid or in trauma. Real love is sticking beside them if they lose a limb and being with them til death, (you know, like you promised?) Real love is deciding (like in my case) that if they have a disease that prevents them from having sex with you that you not only DO NOT go seeking out other men/ women (or porn 😛 )but you stand by them, find ways around the issue, and support the person who is sick. REAL LOVE is watching the BOTH of you grow old… and die.

REAL LOVE IS SELFLESS
REAL LOVE IS DEDICATION
REAL LOVE IS SACRIFICE

REAL LOVE has NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT THEY DO FOR YOU… it has EVERYTHING to do with WHAT YOU DO FOR THEM.

They WILL NOT fix you. You CAN NOT fix them. They WILL NOT make you happy / take away the pan. You CAN NOT make THEM happy / take away THEIR pain.

Real love is acceptance.

Love is not a feeling. It’s saying yes and then doing the “yes” part til death.

Unfortunately, that is the truth and unfortunately, people in this generation have no clue what real love is and they move on from boyfriend to boyfriend or even spouse to spouse “promising” something that they can never give because they do not understand that the issue is in themselves and their misunderstandings of “love”

After all, it’s “patient, kind, etc… 1 Cor 13”

#6.
Don’t be Creepy, Dude…

Or girl. If you get the sense that a person is NOT interested… STOP bugging them. Seriously… like stop…

I’ve seen both men AND women go after a person that is obviously NOT the one and obviously has NO interest in them almost from the start. Just… stop… Be their friend.

Which leads me to number

#7. 
Stop crying “Friend Zoned”

Every time someone decides that they just want to be your friend, accept it as fact and move on.

You are not in some “prison” … you are having a “normal life” where people GET to choose whether they want to be your spouse and / or boy/girlfriend. They are allowed to, it is their right.

Crying “I’ve been FRIENDZONEEEEDDDDDD” is just harboring bitter for something that you have no control over and frankly, you shouldn’t… After all… Deus Vult 😉

Don’t cry over some invisible zone. Realize that God has something else / better for you.

tales from the friend zone

#8. 
Do NOT be the person who is just eternally “indecisive”

This is horribly unattractive.

“I like you… Well, maybe I don’t. No. You’re really pretty… I don’t like you tho. I don’t really want to be in a relationship with you… You’re definitely the one… maybe I was wrong.”

STOP IT!

Make a decision and stop messing with people AND yourself.
“Let your yes be yes and your no be no”

Oh, and stop blaming it on God. That is definitely, unequivocally 190% YOU.

Be CAREFUL how you treat others who are near you. Don’t let someone spend lots of time alone with you that you know has feelings for you and act super friendly with them only to tell them that you are not interested in the long term. That’s just your selfishness and enjoying the “attention.”

love

#9. 
No… God did not “tell you”

This one needs to stop. Seriously. It is honestly THE WORST thing I’ve seen in churches when it comes to marriage/ relationships, etc.

It does SO MUCH HARM! Playing “match maker” or “Marriage prophet” is a BIG NO NO NO NO NO … and it applies to YOU personally too.

Have I seen it happen? Yes. Have I seen it happen lots? No. I have seen probably 10,000 cases of “God told me marry so and so” and maybe THREE instances in which it was actually truth.

My dad (who is prophetic) has a good policy, “NEVER PROPHECY IN MARRIAGE”… good one.

MOST of the time, when a person feels that “god” is telling them that Anna suchandsuchy is their wife, they are 100% wrong. It’s NOT God. It FEELS like God because it’s what the person wants to hear, but in actuality, it’s them. It’s what THEY want. Or, if it’s not, it’s them looking for an answer and attributing something to God that’s not God.

This goes back to #1… “THE ONE” – God told me that “SHE/HE is THE ONE”… more than likely? No He didn’t. You can believe that He did… but I’ve seen MANY of these “God told me’s” turn into divorce and unhappiness.

Because again, they don’t understand “love” …

Don’t tell someone that God told you about THEIR future spouse either. He may have, but do NOT share the who’s why’s how’s… that’s not your job. If God wills it, it will happen.

I could tell you countless stories *SMH* … Just… train wrecks.

TLDR
TL:DR
#1.  Be open, there is no “the one” Be MINDFUL

#2.  PREPARE / get your life together

#3. Date, lots. Don’t throw your heart around, just spend time with people.

#4. Drop fear. Admit that you’re afraid of commitment and stop it.

#5. Stop believing lies about love. It’s selfless and love is about YOU, not them.

#6. Move on. They’re not into you.

#7. Stop with the “Friend zone” thing.

#8. Let your yes be yes and your no be no. Stop with indecisiveness

#9 God didn’t tell you who your spouse is, so don’t believe it

The Greatest Moment in Cinematic History

If I really had to narrow it down, it’d be difficult. But I know what it’d be.

I know some people have “issues” with Christian movies and certainly, some Christian movies are just there to make a profit. Sometimes they have very little heft behind them by the way of story line, meaning, and true inspiration.

But I like some of them, and I’m not one of those people who gets nuts if they’re not “100 percent biblically accurate.”

For this reason, I am TERRIBLY grateful to my mother and father for starting me early in life watching an amazing cinematic masterpiece even by today’s standards called “Ben Hur” …

God help me

If you have never seen this before, I suggest that you find a way to watch it especially if you’re the kind of person who gets something out of movies when you watch them and you’re looking for what is (quite possibly) one of the most amazing stories ever created/ told.

Ben Hur (for those of you who don’t know, skip ahead if you know the movie) – is about a Jewish man during the time of Christ. It’s not a true story, but that is (perhaps) why it is so relate able.

The  author assumes what it would have been like to be a person living during the time of Christ and what might have been happening during that period. Judah Ben Hur could have been any of us.

In a stunning twist, the director chose to never (not once) show the face of of the man portraying Christ and instead show the actions and reactions of those around him. Giving us an up close and personal view of how we see Christ NOW. We don’t need to see His face to be affected by Him, we know who He is by His voice and His presence.

The scene (which I think hits the home run for me) takes place about halfway through the film (a bit under). Judah Ben Hur has been captured and falsely accused of severely injuring man, worse, a Roman, even worse, by his BEST CHILDHOOD FRIEND. And as a result, he is sent into slavery.

As if things couldn’t get any worse for him, apparently Messala (the ex friend) has told the guards forcing him and many other men to walk through the dusty, rocky desert (some bleeding and without shoes) to treat Ben as horribly as possible.

When they break for water, the Roman guard refuses to give water to Ben Hur, leaving him broken, beaten and near death… He falls to the ground in agony and torment and cries, “God… help me…”

And then (in what’s perhaps the most amazing moment in cinematic history…) God is there…

God help me1

Watch below –
(Notice even the Roman’s face as he goes to whip Jesus, and then sees Him. He knows that he can’t whip Him, and doesn’t even realize why- it’s absolutely incredible) What’s amazing is the calm… the breath… there’s this moment before Christ appears. Then He’s just … “there”

This scene is equally amazing because of how it comes into play towards the end of the film.

Seriously, if you have NOT seen it, see it.